I vividly remember being a young teenager, and losing myself in fantasy worlds; traipsing through Narnia and looking for dragons in the Enchanted Forest. I journeyed for the Hero’s Crown and fought with a Blue Sword. I followed Willow and Sarah Williams as they quested with and for babies. I knew, without a doubt, that I wanted magical powers . . . but I lived in the real world, where no one thinks that magic exists.
Currently, I still live in the real world. The rules of gravity and physics still apply to me. I am fully human, and a part of this 3-Dimensional plane of existence. But I know a secret that has changed my life, and I learned it when I was sixteen years old.
I wanted my desire to come true.
One night, when I was fifteen and a half, I sat down on my bed for evening prayers. I grew up in a very strict Catholic household. We went to Mass every Sunday, every feast day. I certainly believed in God, of that I had no doubt. So I knew that if I sat down to pray, if I believed and prayed and was worthy enough, God would answer my prayers. I looked toward the heavens and said, “God, I know you’re out there. You know all my desires. Please, God. Please grant me magical powers on my sixteenth birthday.”
Now, I’m not sure if you have ever prayed before, but in general, those kinds of prayers don’t work. Giving God an ultimatum?! Asking him for something that is completely the antithesis of what my religion considers goodness? Of course he wouldn’t grant that. And it’s not like I was saintly enough to perform miracles. I wasn’t even asking God to do it if He willed it. I was asking for something I wanted more than anything in the world, and I prayed this same prayer every night for six months.
My sixteenth birthday came and went, and I cried quarts when my magical powers didn’t come. All I could feel was this insatiable longing for magic in my life. I was sure that magical powers would solve all my problems. I could tame my crazy, frizzed out mess of hair, I could shrink myself till I was model-skinny, I could be whomever I wanted to be. Funny how I was focused only on the physical realm. I never even thought about all the self-growth and Divine Connection that I would be able to receive if I had magic in my life.
Magic exists; just not the way I thought it would.
One day, at the library, my mom handed me a book. “I found this for you, you might like this,” she said. It was called Teen Witch, by Silver Ravenwolf. I don’t know if she thought it was yet another fantasy novel, or if I was being particularly bitchy that day and she thought she was being funny. I checked it out anyway and took it home.
My world changed overnight.
I learned about Wicca, about an ancient tradition of the God and Goddess, the balance of the world. Included were spells, definitions of tools, the Wiccan Rede, and more. Something about this felt completely right to me. It was as if I had opened up a wormhole into another dimension, a parallel universe. I knew that I absolutely had to learn more.
Looking back now, it is easy to see this is the moment that I started on the path that led me closer to magic, shamanism, and eventually faeries. God, the Divine, the Great Creator, whatever you want to call that Higher Power, did indeed answer my prayers. He answered them in a way that I would never have expected, from someone I never would have expected either. This was not coincidence. I don’t believe in coincidence, anyway; I firmly believe that everything happens for a reason, and that only through hindsight and reflection can you make meaning of anything.
The magic is inside you.
You can choose to believe or you can choose to be skeptical. If you choose to be skeptical; it’s okay. I get it. I am usually skeptical of other peoples’ stories. But please, don’t close yourself off from that part of you that still believes in magic. Once, you were a small child who believed all things were possible. You used to look at the world with wide, wonder-filled eyes. Life can be so much more if you open yourself up to it.
I view the natural world with a sense of wonder. It amazes me that life has developed such intricate ways to survive. Some trees have broad leaves, some have needles. There are butterflies that migrate thousands of miles, and a species of birds that summers at one pole and winters at another. The fact that humans have created technologies that can connect the whole world is magical to me.
You have magic inside you. So does every person on this planet. You are capable of doing amazing things with it. What will you do?